I’m going to get serious on you.
(TW: Body Image)
When fat people–yes, I’m using the f-word because I believe it should return to being an adjective, not a pejorative–are having a very real conversation about fat bodies, fatphobia, and how fat representation in media/entertainment affects them personally, that is not the time for folks who are not now nor have ever been fat to come in and get their hackles up because “body dysmorphia exists for thin people, too.”
It would be like if there was a cancer roundtable happening and someone came in and started insisting appendicitis be included in the talk because appendicitis is also harmful, painful, and can be life-threatening.
YES, we know you feel pain, too. We empathize, we don’t want you to hurt, and we recognize that issue is also valid, but that’s not what the conversation is about today.
Our whole lives, our confidence, body positivity, and inclusion have only ever been broadly permissible if we’re including everyone on our journey. You all well know I’m a huge fan of inclusion and of everyone feeling good in their skin in general, and I’m not advocating cruelly excluding anyone or their pain on purpose. However, fat people are indeed allowed to talk about their struggle without–for once in their life–making additional room for advocates of all sizes. Related to that point, fat people are also allowed to be confident without the expectation that we bring enough confidence for the rest of the class. Some of us are wired to uplift multiple people at once, but there are many others for whom it took everything they had in them to uplift themselves.
If a group of people are discussing fat-centric issues and being fat isn’t your journey, then those specific conversations aren’t your spaces to raise your voice. In addition to the many, many, many thin conversations (often actively excluding empathy for fat people) already happening, there are other inclusive body dysmorphia conversations to join that are for the broader picture of body ideals and the damage they cause for everyone. Get involved there and stop screaming “thin people feel pain, too” in fat spaces.
We are not about you today.
We are saving ourselves today.
Break An Egg For Me 